so i’m going to disney this week !! and i’ll try to keep posting but it is my last week of vacation before school so please be patient and understanding!! i have something really cool planned for you guys when i get back !!! :)


no baby it’s just a bad night i’m absolutely fine: a collaboration between the sainted max and myself

burdensome. /// r.i.d
New moon mirrors: a collaboration between the extraordinary Ryi and myself.

Taken from inkskinned's writing.
I absolutely had to do this. This line is golden. 

in a year you’ll spill over with the maple syrup of her love
and your facebook will be a torture device i use
when i’m halfdrunk and looking to be

in six months i’ll still call you in the dead of night
but you’ll have stopped answering such a long time ago
i’ll just speak diaries into your answering machine,
endless pointless babble

in three months your messages will still be saved
on my phone and i’ll stay up reading them
just to get off on
feeling my heart crumble

i see our end coming maybe a month or two
from right now,
i can hear it click slowly into the chamber
as you bring the gun around

because baby for a while now you’ve been
falling out of love
maybe it’s you maybe it’s our timeline maybe it’s that
i’m not enough

but baby tomorrow you’ll kiss me hard enough
to turn off the sirens screaming in my head
and i won’t realize you’ve charmed me back into believing
until you’ve taken me to bed

but baby tomorrow we’ll still be a couple
we’ll drink lemonade and laugh at bad jokes and
you’ll unstring yourself just a little bit more and i’ll try
sowing myself to your heart just a little bit closer
we’ll seem like we’re doing just fine
instead of perched on the edge of sorrow

and dear god but do i live
for that love you’ll pretend

If you close your eyes, you can almost pretend like it’s all going just fine again. /// r.i.d

"I know he loves me, and he says he is over her, but she’s everything I’m not, and everything I never will be?" (r.i.d)

the late nights will be filled with orange juice and vodka but
when your eyes meet hers i know you’re gonna fall
and galaxies will collide inside your bloodstream
because she’s all that you want and all that you’ll be

and baby
i’ll remember you on the nights where
there’s not enough oxygen inside my bones again
when i’ve got trouble breathing because
i want your lips pressed against my skin in
the same way they’ll
never be again

and i know her perfume will smell like roses because
you always loved the things that came with thorns and
i know that she’ll make you laugh until your sides ache
and you’ll want her more than you can say

and baby
you’ll forget all about how i used to be the only person
who could calm you down about anything or how
on an august night you promised you would love me
until the sun died

you’ll love her and baby
this will all seem like a soft blow
because it’s been so long since we crumbled
that i don’t even know if these ruins
were ever home

and you’ll love her baby because
you’ve got a heart as good as gold
and you’ll love her baby and

i’ll sit here remembering
how i used to be

you burned us down /// r.i.d

i sat there as i ignored the fight
that i could never win
against fear stealing all my restless minutes of sleep and
i was cold and shivering like a dead flower
that has been tossed into a roaring maelstrom of arctic water
but is not dead enough to not feel the pain people ignore

my head was screaming “no” my tears were begging “not again” the silence of my parents’ eyes of the
precious shattered things
where i lied and called them home
and of the hollow place behind all my cracked bones was yelling “let your porcelain face be strong
like the roman numerals you write
counting how many times real and unreal people have said
that it only takes
‘staying strong’
and that
‘things can only get better’”

and the silence’s words like a drummed-in latin prayer
scared me beyond disbelief
you could have asked me “why”
as you danced with a heart that was free
like a bluebird that had never lost its wings and with whom even mother earth had
fallen in love
(but we both know that is not
your heart)

the red on our skin told us a different story how we may never really
literally hit rock-bottom,
there’s still nothing to break the fall of a long life
with broken neurons and strange cells
that are not grey
but only black and blue and that can only “hold up”
for something that can’t possibly be a lifetime
that isn’t cut off in an “untimely” fashion
let something beautiful rest in peace
(don’t try to
resurrect it you’re too smart for that
and your soul is too great darling)

carry on with veins filled with paranoia and
long sleeves and polaroids and
sleepless eyes and smiles that used to be so pretty

“Red lips, blue veins, a smile like a hand grenade” // inkskinned
by Me, Myself and I

The Unknown Soldier: tribute to r.i.d. 

composed by the beautiful inkskinned I just wrote it out haha.
(hope she sees this) her poetry is just too beautiful but imagine a love like that .

baby, please /// r.i.d

i’m your safety net,
the girl you don’t take to bed, the one
you play games with and tell me to put my life on hold
waiting for when
you stop kissing meaningless people and come back
ever the conquering hero who just wants to settle down
with that nice next door girl

well fuck you and fuck the horse you rode in on
my mouth is too beautiful to be filled with the ashes
of waiting on your backburner
my mouth is too beautiful to talk around your name
as if it was a shard of glass i hold between my teeth, no,
i’m not your plan in case your life goes south, i’m
way too fucking good for my whole story to be
“one day he’ll figure it out just wait and see”

i’m not yours i’m not i’m my own fucking person
and i have dreams and hopes and aspirations and
they’re all about a million times more important than
sitting around twiddling my thumbs until i’m your special person
because if you can’t get around to loving me now
don’t fucking bother

somewhere out there is a girl with great hair who would
fall for me the moment that our eyes meet or maybe there’s
somebody who starts a conversation in a library and
never wants to leave my side or maybe it’s a boy just like you
but i’m not ever his fucking fallback, i’m his main attraction

so keep it up keep saying you’re in love
it doesn’t matter to me
all that fucking much.

Written for my friend who asked for a poem about “your best friend telling you that he loves you and that he’ll always have a crush on you and that he thinks we’ll get married some day but he wont break up with his girlfriend.” /// r.i.d

if not all men are “like this” how come “but you can’t expect an animal not to react” is still a fucking good defense choose one either you think men are responsible for their actions or they’re animals and therefore too unintelligent.
i love you
Six word poem /// r.i.d

mother rabbits love their babies with such a wild fervor that they will pluck their own fur out to make blankets for their children to lay in

you asked last night how school was going but i learned a long time ago not to answer honestly and sure enough within five seconds of opening my mouth you were distracted again but something so much more important and later when i was trying to calmly explain that the juice on the floor was an accident, you flew off the handle like i’d spilled the world’s most precious liquid and the whole time you thumped around and shouted your throat raw i just cleaned up the mess and waited until i could go back to my room without you making a comment

a mama killdeer will fly from the nest and lead danger away even if it kills her

and it just kills me how little you actually know me and how much of my life you have missed because most of our interactions are either you yelling at me or me being dismissed

i mean for awhile now i’ve realized
that i’m the more mature person
in this relationship.

What I want, more than anything in this world, is to make them happy, make them proud of me, but all they leave me with are bitter words and an emptiness that swallows me whole…” /// r.i.d